Meet My Niece

danielle anne, full scholar of Philippine Science High School and a consistent Director's Lister. no wonder as my cousin (from father's side) and his wife are both UP graduates.

kuya B shared danielle's homework which she wrote for less than an hour. very good job!! i am so proud of you, danielle!

Margaret

by Danielle Anne

Back when I was six, my godmother, Aunt Jen, gave me a tiny rag doll which I named Margaret. Margaret had brown hair, black eyes, and a button nose. These features stood out against her lilac dress and pink Mary Janes. I loved Margaret so much that I took her everywhere I went. Margaret became my accessory, and I was barely seen without her.

One day, I went to play with Diane, the little girl next door. We played for a few minutes then Diane excused herself for she had something to show me. I was astounded the moment she presented me her limited edition Pokemon gold coins. Envy and astonishment filled me, so I hugged Margaret tightly. As if Diane read my mind, she eyed my Margaret and told me “You like my coins, right? I’ll gladly trade them for your doll”. My eyes widened, my mouth opened. The limited edition coins, which I only see in the Western magazines my grandma sent us, soon to be mine in exchange for my doll. “I’m waiting for your response,” Diane muttered “or I might change my mind”.

The butterflies in my tummy started to flutter. If I agree, I lose my friend whom I loved dearly, but I get the pride of possessing the coins and the fulfillment of my desire. If I do not, I keep Margaret but the emptiness in my soul will be left, well, empty. “I don’t have forever,” Diane stammered.
I meant to say “No thank you, I’ll just go home with Margaret. Goodbye,” but instead I said “Fine, the doll’s all yours!”, handed her Margaret, and took the coins. So I went home with a big smile and a handful of coins. They’re finally mine! From this moment, my life’s complete!

Or at least I thought. That night, after mom kissed me goodnight, I stretched out an arm to grab Margaret. Then I remembered I gave her away. I realized sleeping without her beside me is agonizing, adding the fact that it was my decision. The next day, I tried to return the coins and ask for Margaret. The attempt did no good. I sat on a corner and suddenly felt my doll’s loss. Margaret, whom I embraced every time I go to sleep, whom I spent the good and bad times with, whom I loved so much, is gone. I wept softly as I recalled the moments I shared with Margaret.

Now, the memory of the trade still haunts me. Though, it taught me a valuable lesson: Think twice before acting.

I Speak Healing

in His Name..

- last last sunday, i cannot get up sa sobrang hilo. this made me cry because i feel so crappy.
- until now i still have colds. it's two weeks already that i could hardly breathe.
- headache. perhaps dahil sa sipon na ayaw lumabas.
- swollen left eye. mama and i went to st lukes hospital last friday. first time that i use my maxicare card. the doctor just asked me some questions and checked my left eye then gave me the medication. the check-up was done in less than 10 minutes! he didn't even told me of the cause. my bad that i did not ask.
- dysmenorrhea. well, this is not new to my system. and today is the first day of my monthly period.

i will schedule another check-up this week and a vacation leave. i deserve and need rest.

"i claim healing to all my sickness. i pray for a healthy 2010. amen."

Seldom

that i talk about how i feel. much as i wanted to be more transparent but i am not that good at expressing my emotions and i am afraid that i might be misunderstood.

i've tried..as the result was undesirable, well, i guess i'll just keep it to myself.

''tay, mold me. i know that it is not an overnight process. i fail still. i am your work in progress..salamat that i can cry out to you and that you never give up on me though most of the time i am stubborn. thank you for loving me 'tay as i am. amen."

The Beach and The Sunset

Carla (Rica) Peralejo and Joe Bonifacio's Same Day Edit from Jason Magbanua on Vimeo.


i cried when i saw the video. the exchange of vows was lovely. i am not personally related to them but we're in one spiritual family. i am so blessed with their story and was inspired by their wedding - the beach and the sunset.

when cesar proposed marriage in boracay at 17:55, it has given the beach and the sunset a different meaning.

the beach - crossing over to the other side. before i entered into a romantic relationship with him, i had my quiet moment with the lord, a one on one talk with my tatay in heaven. that was during my vacation in sydney. after i took breakfast, i sat at the veranda and with me are my bible and my ever reliable ipod nano. "is this where you want me to be? what about my career? my future?" and the questioning goes on. here's the word that i received from him in the morning of oct 7: "never be afraid to trust an unknown future to a known God." then he reminded me of jeremiah 29:11 "for i know the plans i have for you, says the lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." on that day, i knew what the answer is..when i said yes to cesar, it means "yes, i am ready to follow his will. i am ready to go over to the other side taking God as the captain of our ship."

the sunset - it is time...to leave singlehood (which i truly enjoyed!) and moved on to the next level of maturity. a reminder that everyday is passing, that when the sun sets it means that another day is about to begin. a new hope and another day to trust God. and it also means that we are getting closer to the day of the fulfillment of his promises.

Zero

late for the month of january. yey!! will do better in feb.

Name

no need to go to NSO to request for birth cert and cert of no marriage :-) salamat sa e-census!

then i realized that i need to get a new passport (i just renewed it last year) and update all my identification cards. as well, i need to practice my new signature! well, that is after cesar gave his name to me pa naman.

i also remember my highschool teacher asked us this question: "bakit kapag meron kayong ginawang maganda, ang tatay ang unang natutuwa?" the answer: "kasi dala-dala nyo ung pangalan nya." i am proud to say that i have given honor to my father's name. sikat ata ang lozendo sa school. and in a few months, i will carry my spouse's..

Excited

mama is excited. the whole family is excited and i love them! mama called up lola m and tita l to ask about the processing of marriage license. tita b texted me, sya na raw mag-aasikaso ng documents needed from NSO. and so on...honestly, when it comes to processing of papers, i don't have any patience. lalo na sa mga government agencies. that is why i am so thankful for my tita's who are very supportive and so eager to help me and cesar in getting a marriage license.

my girlfriends are also excited for us! i have received two wedding mags from my dear friends. last week, cathy surprised me with a wedding mag and a rose. she put it in my workstation with a sweet note. i enjoyed browsing and reading the magazines while getting great ideas for our dream wedding. maraming salamat, girls!

from jen

from cathy

and of course, my hubby-to-be is super excited to begin our life together. i simply love the way he prepares for our home. he has started investing and buying stuff already. i like it when every time he plan to buy something, he gets my opinion and my approval first. ang sarap daw ng feeling pinaghahandaan ang buhay pagaasawa :-) i love you, dy!! looking forward to spend my everyday with you.

almost 2am when he finished assembling the tv rack

with the help of his BS-mates, tada!! na-assemble na ang bed :-)

All Things Are Possible!

"ngayon pa ba ko magdududa sa yo, 'Tay? sa lahat ng ginawa mo sa buhay ko, sa lahat ng mga sagot mo sa panalangin ko..ngayon pa? hinding hindi, 'Tay."

Jesus looked at them and said "With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible. -Matthew 19:26

YES!

"kuya pakihinto!! pakihinto ho ung bangka! may tatanungin lang ako sa babaeng 'to..."

"gusto ko ng gawing official.."

"pam,....will you marry me?"

Dreams

lately, i do not enjoy my work. it's boring and routinary. well, that's how i am feeling..and i thought, when i retire, i wanted to be a pre-school teacher. whoa!! this was my childhood dream!!

aside from teaching, there are a lot of things that i wanted to try...like baking, baking and baking :-) and cooking..and social working...and ahmm, interior designing.. and writing.

and i will never stop dreaming..libre naman e :-)

Breakthroughs

spiritual life..more of God and less of me. devote more time in reading his word, in praying and in listening. often brag about his goodness and faithfulness to my family, to cesar, to my friends, and to my sphere of influence. "lord, give me the boldness to share Your love with the people who are so dear to me."

career..not that i don't like my job, but i feel that i am not growing. i am craving for something new. "guide my steps, father. i pray for opportunities and for promotions."

finances..it is his plan to prosper me. i will train and discipline myself to be a good steward of my finances and be more wise in my spendings. "bless the work of my hands. open the floodgates of heaven and pour out your blessings."

"if i seek you first, lord, and your righteousness, all these things will be given as well."

Coffe shop

it was pass 8pm (11pm, aussie time), still i did not get any text message from him. the last text that i received was he's on his way to the gym.. i'm super worried then. i tried to contact him on his mobile phone but it cannot be reached. what's happening??? i just wanna know if he's safe home. please please reply...

thank God! after an hour he message me, nakatulog daw sya. dapat iidlip lang pero sa sobrang pagod nagtuloy-tuloy ang tulog at kanina pa lowbatt phone nya. ok..reason accepted. ang importante, alam ko na he is safe.

around 1030 pm, manila time, he texted me "hindi ako makatulog, my." why oh why??? what's wrong?!? he asked me a favor..."my, may ka-date raw si L sa may coffee bean sa convergy's. pwede puntahan mo? tignan mo naman ung guy. diskyumpado kasi ako e. please." ah, un naman pala! ang protective naman ng kuya :-) for his peace of mind at para maituloy na nya tulog nya, i said, "ok, puntahan ko na sa coffee bean."

i went to the ladies room first and fix myself. words are running through my head. what will i do?? what will i say if i see them?? "uy, nandito rin pala kayo." bahala na..i asked my teammate to accompany me and i explained to her the situation. sabi ko para hindi obvious na inutusan ako ng kuya nya, dapat may kasama ako.

this is it! palapit na kami..then i noticed a familiar guy standing near the corner of cofee bean..OMG!!! is this for real???? waaaah!!! naisahan ako!!!

that was a wonderful sweet surprise..

i hugged him..then pinakilala ko sa teammate ko.."si cesar, boyfriend ko."

Goal

one of my faith goals for this year is to read more books. to start the year with enthusiasm and to renew my perspective about work, i'm reading john maxwell's leadership gold book. this is timing as well in preparation for the yearly individual development plan. go for the gold!

Timepiece

chrissy gift from cesar. thank you, dy!! love you.

Welcome 2010!

enjoyed watching the fireworks with mama and kuya. location -- bubong ng bahay :-)

"lord, thank you for 2009! your love endureth forever. more of you this 2010..amen."